the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
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