Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize
