Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
Firetruck pulls up, fireman jumps out n knocks on my door, asks "do you know where Johnny lives?"
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
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