he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
My new dentist just kinda stared at me when I told him that I used to have partial dentures after breaking 2 teeth while beating the shit out of someone, until I puked them into the toilet and flushed them after getting high and making myself undercooked mac and cheese.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
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