yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
vagina is talking i cant
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know we have no secrets, right? I mean, you saw me shitting in a gift bag drunk and naked on Christmas eve.
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
I baked a frozen pizza completely, put it back in the plastic and box, and put it back in the freezer. THAT drunk.
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
Randomize