I want to have your abortion
someone get that fucking seahorse.
Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
Barsexuality is the new black.
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
Randomize
