Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize
