why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My vagina just recognized that song.
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
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