Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
I still have that dildo-suction bruise on my forehead and this sweater STILL smells like my Christmas Eve vomit.
He updated Facebook... "Got a new phone today." WHAT ABOUT THE FUCKING KID YOU HAD?!
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
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