Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
I think I'm drunk. That wine was old. I found it behind the water heater next to the mouse poison.
I can't feel my brain.
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
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