susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
I realized courtney is my jiminy cricket but instead of preventing me from telling lies she prevents me from fucking strangers
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
Randomize