You're my little dorito
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
There's even glitter on my cock...
Randomize
