Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
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