I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
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I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
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Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
Being drunk with magicians is fucking mind blowing. This Asian guy just made a platypus appear and disappear. This is not a drill.
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
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