Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
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Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
I've been on the toilet for an hour. On a six day bender. My ass feels like its leaking vodka
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
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