just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
I'm going to get so drunk tonight, I actually feel bad about the 30 seconds of drunken awkward sex I'm going to have with one lucky fat chick.
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
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