yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
he quoted the bible to break up with me
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
Randomize
