if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
Swear to god, if I have to wingman for you on my honeymoon I'm gonna be pissed
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
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