I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
Randomize
