apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
I don't believe in coincidence. I believe in the stars aligning perfectly to sodomise me in public. Who ever said I was cynical?
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
Randomize