their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
Hello and welcome to the game 'Matt needs weed'! Rules are simple: first one to find a bag wins the fabulous prize of getting stoned with yours truly. Thank you for playing and good luck!!
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?