Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
do nipples grow back?
Randomize
