super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
Look. If you get me out of this speeding ticket you can bang my sister. Or my mom. But not both.
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
Randomize
