these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
Randomize
