How'd it feel making her break her religion?
he's super hid and wouldn't leave us alone so i snatched his phone and started texting lovelink (thanks for a well-timed commercial) that will cost him money. muhahaha
I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
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