I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
Just saw a policeman use his lights to go through a red light only to turn them off and go to Sonic...
I'm drinking reisling in a paper cup by myself in the garage.
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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