Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
Randomize
