I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
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