i'm almost one hundred percent positive that i have a warrant out for my arrest in this city. i also don't give a fuck because im drinking TEQUILAAAA
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
Just saw a homeless guy with a sign that said "Family abducted by aliens. Need money for ransom" and on the back of the sign it said "And it's only $.88"
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
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