At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
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