So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
Sorry for not calling you back. I got drunk and passed out on the kitchen floor. I just found my phone in the shower.
Randomize
