Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
Your first words after putting out the flames, "how am I supposed to eat girls out with my top lip burned off??"
Yeah no more flaming everclear shots.
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
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