if i can run in heels then i can drive
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
Doing bumps while the kids play upstairs. #bestnannyever
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
Randomize