He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
Jen gave my number to some guy she met in NY. He sent me a picture of his weiner. He had nice shoes. I replied with a pic of bacon.
When in doubt always reply with bacon.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
Randomize
