he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
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