I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
This is drunk me apologizing to sober me in advance.. I am sprry about you're trashed house. Mom an dad will be home by 5 so get up and clean. P.s. Mike is in the closet passed out.
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
Go christen that room with your naked body.
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
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