I got chris browned last night
Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
rolled in at 7am w/ 2 girls i met at the strip club. my neighbor was getting up to mow the lawn before he took his kids to school. i'm 31. he's younger. if given the chance, you think he'd want to switch places?
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
Just had an old man tip me two dollars and say "here put this in your baby fund, you'll have a baby someday" I swear this is gods way of saying GET ON BIRTH CONTROL NOW!
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
I need to start journaling my drunk thoughts. Drunk me is fucking brilliant & sober me is missing out.
Randomize
