I need help removing her.
I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
All I recall is being at the strip club doing dark rum shots and then puking a question mark on the wall above the garbage can in the men's room and having diarrhea in the sink. 6th drunkest I've ever been without blacking out.
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
Randomize
