what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
They've already turned me into the Dean of Students once because they felt 'unsafe' because I came home hammered and asked one of them to make me a grilled cheese sandwich. Like, I just ASKED!
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
Randomize
