JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
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