This girl is more easily done than said...
After you pregamed and were plastered you saw the cop was parked illegally so you gave him a citizens arrest
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"
I lied.
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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