I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
i was just outside smoking and i saw a hooker sing "i wish i knew who your daddy was" to her new born baby. someone explain to me why i ever left chicago to go to college...
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
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