If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
Is that strawberry winking at me??
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
