How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
Help. Why am I so naked?
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