Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
"Grocery shopping" is really just a euphemism for spending $20 on enough frozen food to last 2 weeks and spending the rest of your viable paycheck on alcohol.
I love our relationship. We just get drunk, show each other our tits, demonstrate sexual positions and make pasta. Then you go to bed and I sit around with your mom and cry about how proud of you we are.
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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