If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
Well, he's moving. Now my only options are to accept it or fake a pregnancy; and since you are my only pregnant friend I'm going to need you to pee on this stick for me.
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
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