he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
Woke up this morning on my couch at 6am fully dressed including heels, holding half a corn dog. I called you last night when I was buying the corn dog from a street vendor, I think.
I am in love with you.
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
Randomize
