she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
I think weed is turning my hair brown
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
Randomize
