It's like a parade of train wrecks.
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
I just dropped a condom on the floor at costco in front of my girlfriend and her husband. Today is not going to go well.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
God, I missed his penis.
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize