yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
Please say a prayer for the elevator people at work today. My farts are significantly more potent the day after hitting that korean place for lunch...
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
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