i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
Randomize
