fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
Randomize
